Mothers
by Kitsune-Teme
Summary: If Garra thought that Shukaku was his mother, What's stopping Kyuubi from doing the same to Naruto? After a Slaughter, he gain a guardian. When they betray him, he gains a mother.
1. Mother?

_**Mothers, Chapter 1: Prelouge**_

=Konoha Streets=

A four year-old, blond boy is running in the rain. Just a normal boy running, nothing out of the ordinary, not even the mob of angry drunken civilians.

Nope, just another normal day for Naruto Uzumaki. Fortunately (or not so), all that is about to change as Naruto runs into a side-alley to se a brick wall. He turns around as the mob blocks off the exit.

"Nowshh yoush ganna dieee mmmmonshtor." Slurred a drunk, many cheers and similar statements followed. The young blond cried and asked what he did, but they didn't listen. "Nowsh Iz makes me family yoush killed all appy in yoush deadsth." Ranted the first drunk as he pulled out a knife, while others had similar thoughts and pulled out their own weapons. As they mutilated the poor kid they didn't realize he feinted, but they wouldn't have cared anyway.

=???=

The boy woke up feeling wet, wet but warm. He stood up and looked around to see he was in a dark tunnel that was waist deep in water. _**(He's still four, remember?) **_Looking around, he noticed a faint red glow that seemed to be the source of the warmth. Not wanting for the heat to go away, he followed it toward a giant room. The room was fairly plain except for one wall was made of bars with a metal block that had a weird doodle on it. Seeing as the heat was coming from the other side of the bars he went closer, until five MASSIVE claws slammed through the bars and stopped a millimeter from Naruto's nose. He shrieked in surprise and fell on his rear.

Two great red slanted eyes with animalistic pupils opened and looked at the boy, holding mirth and hidden surprise. **"Well, well,"** spoke a deep yet warm and soothing voice, **"The little kit has come for a visit. Hm, tell me young one, where is your mother?"** The frightened young boy answered with a shaky "I-I don't know. T-the pe-people said sh-sh-she left me for being a m-m-m-monster." He then proceeded to bawl his eyes out.

The eyes narrowed, then seemed to light up **"Well, young kit, I am your mother. Those bad men lied to you. You see, on the day of you birth, a bad man took control of me and made your father seal me up inside you."** Explained the eyes and fuzzy muzzle that accompanied them.

"**Do you see the doodle on this cage?"** 'Mother' asked. Getting a nod from the boy, she continued, **" If you could change it to look like this,"** a doodle with three spirals around it instead of eight appeared above the seal. **"Then I could protect you and speak to you, my child. Don't you want your mother to be with you?" **

Naruto quickly nodded and walked up to the cage and the 'doodle' lowered to him. He quickly smudged out five of the little spirals, and felt an overflowing pain, **"I'm sorry, Naruto. The pain will stop soon and all will be alright, don't worry." **Naruto saw red, then black. Then, he woke up.

=Konoha Streets=

Thirty seconds after Naruto fainted, a red aura lashed out and knocked back all of the near by mob. Getting up, Naruto heard the beautiful voice. **"Give me their tainted blood; give me the blood of those that hurt you, my son. You know what to do."**

With a maniacal smile, Naruto reached out as crimson flames reached out and grabbed the villagers, not harming them yet. "Fire prison." Said the crazed four-year-old, "Instant Cremation!!" The flames seemed to crush and evaporate the people trapped inside, as blood seeped to the ground, Naruto fainted hearing mother. **"Good boy, momma will protect you."**


	2. Betrayal

_**Mothers, Chapter 2: Betrayal**_

=Hokage's Office=

Sarutobi Sasuke sat in his office wondering what to do with Naruto. The boy had killed 27 civilians and 4 chunin after accessing Kyuubi's power, and is now saying his 'mother' did it. "*Sigh* What will I do with you… I know! Secretary, bring me Atoka Sakura." A few minuets later a woman with short blue hair, hazel eyes, and a young, almost childish, air about her, came in.

"What can I do for you, Hokage-sama?" Sakura asked.

"I need you to look after Uzumaki Naruto, he's becoming mentally unstable and is talking as if he knows his mother. I believe that after the beating his more base instincts came out and sought comfort, and the Kyuubi must be tricking him into believing it to be his mom. I know you lost most of your family to the beast, but if we don't stop this now, who knows what will happen. We will seal his memories up until this point and implant new ones of living with you. Do you accept?" The Sandime asked, hoping that she would accept and help with his development.

After a while of thinking it over, she responded "I will do as you ask, Hokage-sama." Looking at the Hokage she saw him relax.

"Good, now let's go take care of those seals." He offered as he got up. Both of them disappeared in separate swirls of leaves.

=Konoha; 2 years later=

It was late at night and Naruto was scarred, a person dressed in all black was chasing him. He managed to lose them in the woods, only to get lost and end up on the Hokage Mountain!!

As he ran, he stumbled over several rocks and twigs, getting scrapes, cuts, and bruises. Finally getting cornered, the person threw several kunai and shuriken at Naruto, but only some hit him. In his fear driven state, he cried out the first thing that came out.

"Momma!!! Help Me!!!" as the masked killer threw another kunai at his head, a red substance seemed to rise up and catch the weapon. The red stuff then wrapped around the person and proceeded to burn/crush them. After the person was released, Naruto slowly walked up and pulled off the face mask.

"Momma..? Why… Why did you attack me?" whimpered out the six-year-old.

"Because the Council ordered me to." She responded with some blood coming to her mouth.

"So, you had no choice, right? They made-" started Naruto until she interrupted him.

"No, I volunteered for this mission. Try as I might, all I could ever see is the Kyuubi. I guess that, in the end, I always hated you." Sakura said with her dying breath.

Now Naruto was shaken to his very core. 'she hated me? All the time? Why… why does this keep happening to me? Why can't I just have a mother?!' "IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!?!" he screamed to the sky as a burning started on his forehead. As he cried in pain, both emotionally and physically, a seal appeared on his left temple. The seal started to glow red, then burned off and was replaced by a red kanji for 'Hope'. Memories started rushing back to him, and his brain shut down.


	3. Results

_**Mothers, Chapter 3: Results**_

= Two Years Later, Council Chambers =

"Everyone, I have brought you here today to discuss making Uzumaki Naruto a shinobi of Konoha." The Sandime's suggestion was returned with many of the civilians shouting in panic, especially the Haruno.

"We can't let that thing near the children! It'll slaughter them!"

"Are you mad?"

"You should just kill it!" These were some of the screams of outrage coming from the civilians. The clan heads were trying to think of why the Hokage would do this.

"QUIET!" boomed the Hokage's voice. "Naruto will be a shinobi. Hopefully, he will find compassion and return to being a normal person. It is, after all, your fault he's like this."

The counsel lowered their heads at that. It was no secret that the reason Naruto's foster mother tried to kill him was their order, but they managed to hide all the evidence. After that day, 48 assassination missions have been taken, with no success.

The Jinchuuriki's mental health has taken a turn for the worse, and every attempt to put him in an asylum has ended in bloodshed. He is constantly talking to his 'Mother', which everyone assumes is the Kyuubi, and has taken a cold disposition to everyone around him. The total amount of kills is 154+, the plus is because sometimes they can't make heads or tails of the remains.

The Kyuubi's chakra has become a cloak that is solid red and constantly flows in a non-existent wind. No one has seen his face and lived except for the Hokage.

= The next day, First day of the Academe =

A little raven-haired boy was standing with a taller, raven-haired 16-year-old. While looking at everyone else he spots a strange student wearing a blood red cloak that casts shadows over his face, and black T-shirt/cargo pants. He is strangest because he is standing alone, and everyone is giving him a wide berth.

"Aniki, who is that?" he points to the stranger while pulling on his older brother's pant leg. The older boy looks over to see, to his surprise, Naruto.

"Sasuke, that is Uzumaki Naruto. That boy is very powerful, but has some problems. I would advise giving him some space." He replied.

"Itachi nii-san, He isn't as powerful as you! You're the greatest!" enthusiastically spoke Sasuke.

/\

_**(It took me forever to get this word right!!)**_

"Actually Sasuke, if he wanted to… He could kill everyone in Konoha." This brought a gasp from Sasuke. "Remember this conversation."

Meanwhile, almost every student was having similar conversations with their parents. Most students looked over at him in fear, while there were some looks of pity, and a couple of admiration. All in all, the message was clear. 'Don't mess with this kid!!!'

Later in the class room, the teachers had decided to make everyone introduce themselves. Everyone held their breath after Sasuke, knowing who came next. "U-Uzumaki N-Naruto." Naruto stood up and introduced him self in the same manor as everyone else… sorta.

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto. I like Mother and blood. I hate everything else." He spoke in his usual emotionally void tone. After he sat down the next student was called up. "O-okay, Yamanaka Ino." The girl stood up, almost fainting on the spot, and finished the introduction. After five minuets, everyone stayed in silence, until the teachers continued to explain what to expect for the next four years.

Thoughts were the same through out the class, 'This is gonna be a looooong year.'


	4. Schooldays

_**Mothers, Chapter 4: Schooldays!**_

_**(I am taking parts of Yu-Yu Hakusho and X-men then adding them to my story. If you don't like it then you can kiss my ass. I do not own Yu-Yu Hakusho, nor any other existing story, game, show, ect. If I did, I wouldn't have time for . Oh and the rookie nine are all 11 except Sasuke and Naruto, who's birthdays I put at September 23**__**rd**__**, and October 9**__**th**__**, respectively)**_

= Three-and-three-fourth Years Later: Academe, Iruka's Class =

Umino Iruka sighed. After two-and-a-half years of teaching this class, things were really getting stressful for him. Half way through the first year, Naruto had killed the teacher in self-defense when the man pulled a kunai on him during a sparing match. This resulted in a forth of the class dropping out, and half of those had developed a fear of blood.

Three-fourths through the second year, on October 6, a few homeless drunks attacked the boy with Moldova Cocktails. They ended up as a smear on the side walk, and a third of the remaining class had quit, bringing the total left to half of the starting number.

And just today, a spy had stolen some documents and was running by, when Naruto shouted to him something along the lines of 'Mother hungers for blood!' and his red cloak stretched out, wrapped around the man when Naruto held out his hand, and when he clenched his fist, it DISINTAGRATED HIM! None of him remained! The only thing left untouched was the documents…

'How could this happen… They really turned him into a monster.' Thought Iruka while filling out his witness report. To him, the most depressing thing, personally, was the fact that Naruto and Sasuke both had fan-clubs, obsessed with 'saving them from their own darkness', although Naruto's members were more discreet because of his bloodthirsty nature. Iruka recalled that day it all started.

= Flashback: Four-and-a-half Months ago in July=

It was the class sparring session and they had finally gotten to the final round, Sasuke had defeated two nobody's and Shikamaru gave up in the first round. Naruto had had Kiba and two nobody give up against him. Before Iruka started the match, he did what he did before every match against Naruto.

"D-do you wish to give up?" stuttered Iruka. Sasuke looked to Naruto and asked him a question no one thought to ask before.

"Oi Whiskers!" He called to the blonde. Naruto cloaked face swiveled toward him. "If I fight you, do you promise not to kill me. I still have a goal in life after all.

Naruto response, along with the comment afterward, shocked most people. He tilted his head to the side, as if listening to a distant sound, and responded in his normal bland voice, "Very well, Uchiha. Mother would hate for her greatest gift to go to waste."

This made many students, including Sasuke, to mummer about this 'greatest gift'. They were broken out of their guesswork by Iruka.

"Alright, today's sparring match between Uchiha Sasuke and Uzumaki Naruto, _Hajime!_"

At the call Sasuke and Naruto jumped apart, Sasuke pulled out six kunai and held them in between his closed knuckles, to make it look like he had claws, and charged at Naruto. Meanwhile, Naruto's cloak had gone into his back and three red claws shot out of his knuckles with a 'SHHNK', making some blood splatter on the ground.

Much of the class was speechless for three good reasons… The claws, He showed his face, and his FACE! He had a rugged feral look to him, instead of the pretty-boy look Sasuke sported; many girls who preferred this look had instantly switched sides.

Both males worked hard, and therefore lacked most baby fat, despite being ten-year-olds. That only helped their fanbase grow. Naruto's untamed hair and dark whisker marks made him and Kiba notice a faint vanilla scent. Anyway, back to the fight. The two collided with a loud clang that resounded in the nearby district, bringing many ninja to observe, after a few seconds of pushing their 'claws' against each other, both boys pulled back simultaneously and started to slash at each other.

After three minuets of hacking and slashing at each other, the two finally broke apart, and every ninja in the village has come to see this. Classes were ended early, lunches left half eaten and paid for, the Hokage's office's sliding glass was left open and papers were flying out the window! The boys then started to do hand signs and both ended on the Tora seal.

Two cries of "Fire Style: Fireball Jutsu!" were heard, and the middle of the training arena was engulfed by two flames on either side. After five seconds the fireballs merged and exploded, leaving a giant cloud of smoke and dust covering the place. A pair of Anbu in a dog mask and a cat mask used 'Air Style: Blowback Jutsu' to clear the derbies, and the sight shocked everyone.

Naruto and Sasuke both were missing most colthing, much to the fangirls enjoyment, but were covered with severe burn marks, and both were on the ground, unconscious.

= End Flashback =

When they got into the hospital was even stranger than the fight itself.

= Flashback Resume-Hospital: Three Minuets later=

It turns out that Naruto and Sasuke had both fainted, not from pain of the burning, but by smoke inhalation. After getting their lungs pumped clean, and given oxygen masks, the doctors started to operate on the two burned Ninja-hopefuls, knowing full well that if they could not remove the scar tissue then neither would be a ninja. Sasuke had 25 people helping him, Naruto only had two.

Suddenly the red chakra had started leaking out of Naruto's seal and shoved every doctor away! The red chakra then proceeded to engulf the two boys. The doctors watched in fascination and horror and the foul, murderous substance started to heal-no, REGENERATE the lost skin after the burned tissue seemingly peeled of and disintegrated. The worse part was when the fox's power started to separate, some into Sasuke, but most back into Naruto.

When the doctor's stood back up, they wearily made their way over to the two, but jumped back when the two shot into sitting positions. Sasuke looked at Naruto with a questioning expression on his face, and the blond boy just nodded. After a few more seconds of staring, the unimaginable happened, the two boys smiled at each other! Not Sasuke's 'better than thou'' smirk, and not Naruto's 'Psychotic murderer grin' either! Just an acknowledging smile! Then, while the doctors were still stunned, the pair just got up and left! The Hokage took them with him to ask what happened, while Iruka was still standing shocked at the room through the glass, not believing what just happened.

= Flashback End =

From that day on, Naruto and Sasuke often appeared together, and disappeared for that matter. Two months of this happening and the Sandime decided to move Naruto in with Sasuke, hoping that the two would help each other open up more. To bad for him, it worked.

The two have opened up to each other, and often sat next to each other, but they have become even more distant to other people. The Sandime was the only person they seemed to open up to, and even then it wasn't much. They're personalities have been rubbing off on one another. Sasuke has even less emotion and Naruto is becoming more arrogant. Iruka had a feeling that things will only get a lot worse.


	5. Brothers and Mothers

_**Mothers, Chapter 5:A Brother and a Mother**_

_**(This chapter starts near the End of the Academe and I'll explain a lot of TYPICAL questions in flashbacks. By typical I mean questions I purposefully placed in the story. If you don't like what I'm doing then you can stop reading. Also, not many people have been reading my other story 'The Curse of Ice'. Please check it out. It has a key to speech and such. Now on with the story.**_

= Academe, three days before Graduation Exam =

Naruto and Sasuke have taken up sitting next to each other during class. There were two reasons for this; One, It was better to keep those you trust nearby. Two, It kept most fangirls from getting to close. The class had three columns of desks and five rows. Each desk sat two people. So it looked like this…

-- -- --

-- -- --

-- -- --

-- -- --

-- -- --

-Teacher's Desk!! XP

Anyway, after that day in the hospital, the two boys have been drifting farther and farther apart from the rest of the class, but closer together. Sasuke will never forget what happened that day.

= Flashback; Mindscape =

Sasuke was floating in a sewer of some sort. "Agh, my head…" moaned Sasuke. He got up and assessed his surroundings. 'Damn. I really must have hit my head… why am I in a sewer!?!' Realizing where he was 'coughnotyetcough' he saw a red light at the end of the tunnel. Figuring that was the way out, he ran in that direction. As he got closer, he began to hear voices.

Dashing into the light, he came upon… a forest. As he walked forward he noticed the voices starting to get louder. He recognized Naruto's voice. "Naruto! Hey, Naruto!" he called out. Then, the voices stopped, and a few seconds later, Naruto had come out of the clearing.

"What are you doing here Sasuke?" asked Naruto in surprise. Sasuke just shrugged his shoulders and responded. "I don't know. The last thing I remembered was an explosion, then I wake up in a sewer, see a red light, run into it, and then I'm here!...Where is here, anyways?" He asked.

"Well…" drew out Naruto. "Hold on, I have to ask mother first." Naruto then ran into the bushes. The voices picked up again, but he couldn't tell what was being said. So, naturally curious, Sasuke ran after Naruto, and toward his and the other voice. Getting closer and in a tree, he could hear bits and pieces of the conversation.

"**Well,--did--Sharingan--"**

"How--come--can--friend?"

"**Maybe--depends--thinks."**

"Mother--here."

"**I--know.--him--talk--kit."**

Sasuke was wondering what they were talking about, when Naruto suddenly appeared in front of him! Sasuke was so shocked that he fell out of the tree! Naruto just looked at him. After a few seconds Sasuke got up and Naruto told him "Hurry up, Mother is waiting."

Entering a clearing Sasuke saw what looked like the Uchiha compound, and Naruto entered 'Sasuke's' house. Running over, Sasuke opened the door and went into the living room. And then he saw her. She had smooth crimson hair, and similar colored eyes. Her chest was well endowed and yet, her hips were pretty thin, her stomach appeared to be flat, but you couldn't tell underneath the dark maroon kimono she was wearing. Lastly, her skin was a sweet creamy color, with no imperfections visible. When she spoke, her voice was as beautiful as her looks**. "Hello, little kit."**

Her voice had Sasuke breathless, the only thing he could manage was, "She's…like an Angel" hearing him, Naruto started to snicker, which brought Sasuke back to the now. "What's so funny, Dobe?" shouted the aggravated Sasuke, forgetting who he was yelling at.

"The fact that Mother couldn't be anything farther from and Angel, yet you called her one just now!" spoke the blonde between laughs. Then the woman spoke from behind Sasuke, making him turn around and look at her.

"**He's right, you know. I am no angel, but rather, a demon."** At that Sasuke started denying it. "Nu-uh. Your beautiful, demons are supposed to be ugly, vicious, bloodthirsty monsters!!!" This made the woman frown.

"**Granted, LESSER demons are ugly, vicious, bloodthirsty monsters, but the stronger breeds are more civil than most humans."** Sasuke was staring at her face and soaking in every word from the lovely being before him. **"Also, there is the fact that some demons are quite nice and will give you humans a gift, one of which you hold."** Hearing this, Sasuke tilted his head to the side with a clueless look on his face, so Naruto decided to elaborate. "All bloodlines come from demons. The Water Manipulation came from the Sanbi, Byakugan came from the Nibi, Iron Sand control came from the Ichibi, and you Sharingan came from Mother, The Kyuubi." After the final sentence was said, Sasuke spun around and yelled at him. "THE SHARINGAN CAME FROM THE KYUUBI!!! THE KYUUBI IS YOU MOTHER!!!!!" He then took a DEEP breath to calm down. After he was done, Kyuubi spoke again.

"**Yes kit, I have made Naruto into my son, and yes, I granted your ancestors the Sharingan. It was my greatest achievement, and my worst mistake."** Sasuke turned around and listened to her again. **"Now then, I have a mission for you Sasuke-"** He was about to speak when the cut him off by continuing. **"What I need you and Naruto to do, is kill three men, Orochimaru, Uchiha Madara, and your brother, Uchiha Itachi. The reasons for these are simple. Orochimaru snuck into my den with Madara and killed my kits while I was out hunting."** A few tear fell from her eye's when she spoke of this, until Naruto sat in her lap and she started petting his hair. **"The reason I want Itachi to die, is because he slaughtered your clan using my gift to eliminate said gift. I don't understand why he didn't kill you, but I can look into your memories to try to find a reason. Will you let me?"** Sasuke looked at her. After a while he nodded his consent. She put her finger onto his forehead and Sasuke blacked out.

= Flashback in a Flashback…Very original. . =

"Aniki!! Aniki, where are you?" called out a little Sasuke as he ran through the house. He then went into the kitchen and ran up to a woman with Jet black hair like his. "Momma! Have you seen Aniki? He promised to train me today!" Sasuke's mother looked down at her son and smiled "Itachi is in a meeting with you father, He will be out soon. In the meanwhile, why don't you help your dear Mother with preparing supper?" Sasuke jumped up and down with joy "Okay Momma! I'll help."

Then Itachi and a man with the signature Uchiha Hair and eyes walk in and take a seat at the table. Sasuke sees his brother and looks to his mother. She nods to him. The little boy runs to the table and latches onto the older sibling. "Aniki! You promised to train with me today! Your coming with me after lunch!" Itachi responds by poking Sasuke on the forehead, right in between the temples.

"Calm down Sasuke and eat lunch first. Then, I'll train you in whatever you want." responded Itachi in a voice void of emotion. Sasuke looks into his eyes for a second before latching onto his brother in a hug. "Aniki!"

= Flashback in a Flashback End =

"**That's odd." **Spoke the Kyuubi after taking her finger off of Sasuke's forehead. "What is it?" asked Naruto.

"**Itachi's eyes, even though he spoke without emotion, when he looked at Sasuke, all I saw was love and pride."**, "What do you mean 'love and pride'! He killed everyone the next day!!!" Shouted Sasuke. **"I mean, he left you alone, probably because he loved you…"** this caused everyone to be quiet. **"However, that does not change the fact that he killed the other Uchiha's. He still must be punished."** Sasuke looked up at her with fiery determination in his eyes. "Hai! If he really cared for me, he wouldn't have left me all alone. The Itachi I loved died a long time ago!"

"**Good. Now then, What do you think of Naruto?"** Sasuke was caught off guard by this question, but responded anyway. "I think he is a psychopath, yet… I also feel sorry for him. I've seen the glares people send to him. I've always wondered why, and now that I know the reason… I think they're more ignorant than the creatures called fangirls."

Kyuubi smiled **"Then I have a gift for you." **Sasuke and Naruto (Who is still in her lap) looked at her in question. **"I will protect you and make sure that you can succeed in killing Itachi. Also, I will adopt you as one of my own."** Naruto eyes bulged in excitement, Sasuke looked shocked. "Then, c-can I call you M-Momma?" asked Sasuke, hoping for the chance of having a family again. **"Yes, my little Sasuke-kun, now come and give Momma a hug."** Wasting no time, he leapt off the seat he was on, tackled Kyuubi, and wrapped his arms around her in a hug, tears that were unshed for so many years, now fell freely.

= Very long Flashback End =

Sasuke mentally smiled. Thanks to Kyuubi the three of them could communicate mentally, yet hide more personal thoughts. In three days, they would graduate. A week later, they would be ninja.

Sasuke's train of thought was interrupted by Naruto. 'hey Sasuke, Mother says after the Graduation Exam she wants to give you a present.' Came over the telepathic link.

'Okay, Remember not to mess up' responded Sasuke

'I won't. Don't worry!'

In three days, Their real journey will begin…

_**(AN: I have a poll in my profile page about what people want most in a fanfiction. I'll try to appease my fans from the information I get. I will close it in two more chapters. So vote ASAP, please)**_


	6. Gifts

_**Mothers, Chapter 6: Genin Exams!!!**_

_**(I have noticed that barly anyone has so much as looked at my other stories, let alone read them. This makes me very sad… Yes, even bastard foxes get sad sometimes.[that is what my name means.] Why does no one like them, do they suck that much!?! Ok now that that is over with …On with the story!!!)**_

= Konoha academe, Iruka's Class =

The students were almost done taking the genin exam. So far, the standings were fairly straight forward.

Males:

1. Uzumaki Naruto

2. Uchiha Sasuke

3. Inuzuka Kiba

4. Aburame Shino

-Skipping the nobodies-

11. Amakichi Choji

-Skipping again-

20. Nara Shikamaru

Females:

1. Hyuga Hinata

2. Haruno Sakura

3. Yamanaka Ino

-Again with the Skipping-

Now it was time for the final test… The ninjutsu test.

"Uzumaki Naruto, please perform the Transformation Jutsu." Naruto simply looked at the instructors and put his hands into the Ram handseal. He disappeared in a puff of smoke, and when it cleared, the Yondime Hokage stood in his place, complete with his signature shit-eating grin.

Mizuki was starting to fume. 'How dare this demon take the likeness of the Yondime!! I guess I can take a slight detour tonight to teach it a lesson.' Iruka looked… pleased.

"Alright, Naruto, you pass. Here's your headband, and remember to come back Monday for team assignments." Naruto simply grabbed a headband and left, not saying a word.

= Uchiha Compound =

Naruto and Sasuke were sitting across from each other meditating. After a few seconds, Naruto's cloak reached out and enveloped both of them, taking them into their mindscape.

= Mindscape, Uchiha Compound =

Naruto and Sasuke both got up off the ground where they usually ended up, and started walking to Kyuubi's home. When they arrived, they simply walked in and announced themselves. "Mother, We're here!" The two walked into the living room where Kyuubi was reading a scroll. She looked up as the two sat down.

" **My kits, you've arrived! Good. Now on to business. I've recently been looking through my memories and I've found something very interesting. You see, through the centuries, I have collected many treasures and artifacts, and my kits will need to defend themselves, so I have decided to give you some of my treasures, as soon as you go near my den, of course. When you get a mission that will take you near the area my treasures rest, I shall guide you from there. For now, however, I shall help you two awake your dormant bloodlines."**

This caught them by surprise, but only Naruto was able to express his. "Mother, what do you mean? I don't have a bloodline, do I?" Kyuubi looks at her blonde kit with a comforting smile.

"**Of course you do, my little Naru-chan. You received it from your great-grandfather, whose ancestor received it from my great-great grandfather, the great Kitsune Thief, Kurama no Kitsune. **_**(Told you I would add Yu Yu Hakasho stuff to this story)**_** However, I don't think your grandmother ever released it… Oh well. The point is it is in your blood now, so why not take advantage of it?" **Naruto nods in understanding.

"**Now, your going to wake up tomorrow with your bloodlines unlocked to their highest potential, and I will help you control them when you wake up. But be aware that it will hurt when you wake up. Now, sleep my darlings, and mommy will take good care of you."**

= Uchiha Compound: The next day =

Naruto and Sasuke woke up from their sleep with the EXACT same reaction. "…Ow, ow, ow ,ow! Ow! OW! OW! OW! Asprin!" They ran to the bathroom opened the medicine cabnet and yanked the bottle down. After ripping the cap off, they dumped the contents, grabbed a few each, and swallowed the pills without assistance of liquids. _**(Yes this is possible, I do this with even bigger pills. I just don't like to because of the shitty taste!!!)**_ Then after that was over with, the two orphans ran around the house like a couple of headless chickens until the pills kicked in, resulting in the two falling over right next to each other, numb. Next thing they knew they were in the mindscape.

= Mindscape =

The two got up and walked to Kyuubi's house to see what she wanted.

Upon arriving, Kyuubi started explaining without waiting for them to call out their arrival. **"Naruto, Sasuke. I need to tell you something important. It turns out your bloodlines cannot develop without certain conditions. Sasuke, your Sharingan cannot become the Eternal Mangiako without taking Itachi's Eyes. Naruto, your Mokuton cannot reach its final level without visiting the ancients and having them grant you the final gift. However, you two have plenty of power to defend your selves without having to worry about that for a long time. Now, I want you to find someone for me. I have seen and heard of her in passing, and I believe she could be a lot of help to Sasw-chan. I need you to find the one the villagers call… The Snake Bitch."**


	7. A New Friend

_**Mothers, Chapter 6: A new friend!!!**_

_**(I have noticed that barly anyone has so much as looked at my other stories, let alone read them. This makes me very sad… Yes, even bastard foxes get sad sometimes.[that is what my name means.] Why does no one like them, do they suck that much!?! Ok now that that is over with …On with the story!!!)**_

= Konoha academe, Iruka's Class =

The students were almost done taking the genin exam. So far, the standings were fairly straight forward.

Males:

1. Uzumaki Naruto

2. Uchiha Sasuke

3. Inuzuka Kiba

4. Aburame Shino

-Skipping the nobodies-

11. Amakichi Choji

-Skipping again-

20. Nara Shikamaru

Females:

1. Hyuga Hinata

2. Haruno Sakura

3. Yamanaka Ino

-Again with the Skipping-

Now it was time for the final test… The ninjutsu test.

"Uzumaki Naruto, please perform the Transformation Jutsu." Naruto simply looked at the instructors and put his hands into the Ram handseal. He disappeared in a puff of smoke, and when it cleared, the Yondime Hokage stood in his place, complete with his signature shit-eating grin.

Mizuki was starting to fume. 'How dare this demon take the likeness of the Yondime!! I guess I can take a slight detour after I get IT to teach it a lesson.' Iruka looked… pleased.

"Alright, Naruto, you pass. Here's your headband, and remember to come back Monday for team assignments." Naruto simply grabbed a headband and left, not saying a word.

= Uchiha Compound =

Naruto and Sasuke were sitting across from each other meditating. After a few seconds, Naruto's cloak reached out and enveloped both of them, taking them into their mindscape.

= Mindscape, Uchiha Compound =

Naruto and Sasuke both got up off the ground where they usually ended up, and started walking to Kyuubi's home. When they arrived, they simply walked in and announced themselves. "Mother, We're here!" The two walked into the living room where Kyuubi was reading a scroll. She looked up as the two sat down.

" **My kits, you've arrived! Good. Now on to business. I've recently been looking through my memories and I've found something very interesting. You see, through the centuries, I have collected many treasures and artifacts, and my kits will need to defend themselves, so I have decided to give you some of my treasures, as soon as you go near my den, of course. When you get a mission that will take you near the area my treasures rest, I shall guide you from there. For now, however, I shall help you two awake your dormant bloodlines."**

This caught them by surprise, but only Naruto was able to express his. "Mother, what do you mean? I don't have a bloodline, do I?" Kyuubi looks at her blonde kit with a comforting smile.

"**Of course you do, my little Naru-chan. You received it from your great-grandfather, whose ancestor received it from my great-great grandfather, the great Kitsune Thief, Kurama no Kitsune. **_**(Told you I would add Yu Yu Hakasho stuff to this story)**_** However, I don't think your grandmother ever released it… Oh well. The point is it is in your blood now, so why not take advantage of it?" **Naruto nods in understanding.

"**Now, your going to wake up tomorrow with your bloodlines unlocked to their highest potential, and I will help you control them when you wake up. But be aware that it will hurt when you wake up. Now, sleep my darlings, and mommy will take good care of you."**

= Uchiha Compound: The next day =

Naruto and Sasuke woke up from their sleep with the EXACT same reaction. "…Ow, ow, ow ,ow! Ow! OW! OW! OW! Asprin!" They ran to the bathroom opened the medicine cabnet and yanked the bottle down. After ripping the cap off, they dumped the contents, grabbed a few each, and swallowed the pills without assistance of liquids. _**(Yes this is possible, I do this with even bigger pills. I just don't like to because of the shitty taste!!!)**_ Then after that was over with, the two orphans ran around the house like a couple of headless chickens until the pills kicked in, resulting in the two falling over right next to each other, numb. Next thing they knew they were in the mindscape.

= Mindscape =

The two got up and walked to Kyuubi's house to see what she wanted.

Upon arriving, Kyuubi started explaining without waiting for them to call out their arrival. **"Naruto, Sasuke. I need to tell you something important. It turns out your bloodlines cannot develop without certain conditions. Sasuke, your Sharingan cannot become the Eternal Mangeyko without taking Itachi's Eyes. Naruto, your Mokuton cannot reach its final level without visiting the ancients and having them grant you the final gift. However, you two have plenty of power to defend your selves without having to worry about that for a long time. Now, I want you to find someone for me. I have seen and heard of her in passing, and I believe she could be a lot of help to Sasu-chan. I need you to find the one the villagers call… The Snake Bitch."**

"Mother?"

"**She has been abused and hated, for something she had no control over, just like you. I believe that if you could convince her to be your Jonin instructor, then she would help you flourish, and not ignore you like other teachers would."**

"Ok Mom! We won't fail." The boys said in unison. They then left the mindscape.

= Konoha, Local Dango Shope =

Anko was enjoying her Dango in peace, thanks to the owners of her favorite Dango shop, whom were part of the few people who didn't hate her because of Orochimaru. At least, she was, until two genin sat down across from her.

"Hello, Ms. Snake Bitch." Anko stopped eating instantly, not from the name, no she was used to it, but from the tone of the blonde kid. He sounded so… what's the word?... neutral. It bothered her. She looked down and stared at her new company. Imagine her surprise to see the Kyuubi brat and Last Uchiha sitting there.

"What do you gaki's want?"

"We would like to propose a deal. We know how you've been hated, like me and I would liked your help in exchange for something…" Naruto Said.

"What kind of deal???" Anko was getting suspicious.

"If you agree to be our Jonin instructor-"

"No deal."

"Let me finish,-" he sounded slightly irritated. "If you agree to be our Jonin instructor, we can help you trap a certain white snake."

"How? And why?"

"How is simple. With three students you trained yourself, one holds the most powerful demon and one has the Sharingan, Even a Sannin would have one heck of a fight on his hands. Why is… more complex, If you want to know, come to the Uchiha compound later tonight for your answer. Good bye Ms. Snake Bitch." Anko sat there stunned, she never imagined that ANYONE, let alone a fellow misfit, would try, no, WANT to help her kill Orochimaru. Then something dawned on her.

"MY NAME IS ANKO, GAKI!!!" she yelled.


	8. So it Starts

_**Mothers: Chapter 8, So it starts.**_

_**Disclaimer: Normally, I wouldn't bother with this, since it's obvious I don't own Naruto, but I need to cover my own ass.**_

_**Also, I have been wondering, If you see any stupid mistakes, like my calling Sandime Sasuke instead of Hiruzen, or when I put a little **_**/\ **_**Pointing to Itachi instead on enthusiastically, Please tell me. I'm not going to go back and change the chapters, because then I'd have to change this one, but any mistakes caught now will help the story in the future. Thank you.**_

= Hokage's Office =

Hiruzen Sarutobi was sitting in his office battling the dreaded paperwork, when his doors were slammed open by none other than Anko Miterashi.

"Hokage-Sama, I want to be a Jonin instructor!" Sarutobi instantly froze with his brush in mid-stroke. He slowly looked up with disbelief written all over his face. After a few seconds, he gave a reply befitting a man of his age.

"Huh?"

"You heard me! I want to be a Jonin instructor. However, I'll only accept if you give me two student's of my choice." She stated in a demanding tone.

After a few seconds, he finally asked her, "Are you feeling alright, Anko? Maybe you should lie down."

This made her frown in annoyance, "I'm not joking Sandime, I want to have Sasuke and Naruto for students!" She shouted at him.

He pushed a button on his desk to inform his secretary. "I need the hospital, Anko has become delir-" He was cut short when Anko threw a kunai into the calling system.

"Listen you old geezer!" Snarled a very irate Anko as she got right in front of the poor Hokage. "I am going to take these two as my genin team. I don't care who the third is, as long as I get the two I want. Capeash?" Sarutobi nodded dumbly. "Good, Now when do I pick them up?" She quipped cheerfully, doing a personality flip-flop.

"At the academe, in Iruka's room, tomorrow at 1:15." He replied, a little shaken up from her attitude flip.

"Good!' She then skipped out of the office, going to plan her big entrance tomorrow.

= The Shed, around 11o'clock pm =

Naruto and Sasuke were practicing their newly unlocked Kekki Genki, aka. Sasuke uses Amertaratsu on trees, and Naruto regrows them. After about half and hour, they both stop from hearing a very loud shout of **"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO DOING!"**

Naruto recovered first and responded. "Training. Why do you ask mother?"

"**Well you can train in Mokuton all you want, but no training with the Mangieko."** She said, causing Sasuke to respond.

"What! Why not!" he wined.

"**Because, if you us it too much, it will lead to blindness until you take Itachi's eyes." **

Both Naruto's and Sasuke's eyes widened at that tidbit of information. "WHAT!"

"**You heard me, now stop using it! The last thing I need is for one of my kits to become a cri- Look out!"** Shouted Kyuubi as a giant shuriken approached. Naruto and Sasuke jumped back as it sailed pass them and imbedded itself into a nearby tree.

"Damn, I missed." Complained someone from above them, in the trees.

"Who's there?" called out Naruto, searching through the darkness of the branches to find the attacker. A shadow dropped from the trees, and moved forward to reveal.

"Mizuki-sensei?" "Dun-dun-dun!"

Naruto and Mizuki turn toward Sasuke with looks of 'what the fuck' on their faces. After a few awkward seconds, Mizuki responded "Really?"

Sasuke smiled sheepishly. "Well, it just seemed so right."

"So! It's implied, you don't actually have to go 'Dun-dun-dun!' when something dramatic happens!" scolded Naruto.

"Yeah," Responded Mizuki "That would be a joke off of a lame webcomic." Now it was the youths turn to stair with a 'wtf' look on their faces. (1)

"Uh… What the hell is a webcomic?" inquired Sasuke.

"You know, like from , or ." (2)

"What the hell are you talking about."

"Uh, their websites, on the Internet, that you go to from the computer?" explained Mizuki

The boys looked at each other, then nodded in agreement. "Yep he's crazy."

Mizuki got pissed at this, "Who are you calling crazy, you stupid demon!"

That got their attention. Naruto and Sasuke turned toward each other, nodded, and started playing paper, scissors, rock. This results in Mizuki doing a faceplant. "What the hell are you doing?!" he screamed in frustration.

When they tied, they both looked up and spoke in unison. "Deciding who gets to kill you." They then turned back and resumed their match. After about five minutes of continues ties, Naruto finally won, with a rock.

Mizuki, noticing they were done, started to brag. "Well, it seems you get to die first demon, for you see, I have stolen the Forbidden Scroll of Seals, and with it in my possession, I have unlimited power." He then proceeded to laugh manically.

"Um, don't you hafta, y'know…" Started out Sasuke. "Read it?" This stopped Mizuki in his tracks, ..er, laughs.

"Aw, shiiiiit." He droned out. Naruto started to wrap Mizuki up in his Fire Prison, when his victim started to sputter incoherently. Something around the lines of 'mercy'. So Naruto clenched his fist, and knocked Mizuki out.

"Fine, there's you mercy." Sighed Naruto. Just then, a squad of Anbu appeared. Naruto and Sasuke looked up at them and gave out their thoughts.

"You guys are late/useless."

**The Eemental Countries are a Dead Zone.**

**I do not own 8-Bit Theater, or Looking For Group.**


	9. Teachers Are Freaks

_**Mothers Chapter 9: Tests and Teachers**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or any elements of any Anime/Manga/Movie/Book/Video Game that I may or may not include in this, or any of my stories. Thank you for your cooperation.**_

**Towa: So you finally got off your lazy ass and decided to type this, huh?**

**Kitsune: Hey! I am a very busy man, I'll let you know!**

**Kratos: Really? I thought you were just playing games on the computer and Xbox all day. And on your Nintendo DS.**

**Kitsune: I was also at school!**

**Towa: Where you would play you DS in class, that school right?**

**Kitsune: So? My teachers let me because I'm just that fucking smart!**

**Towa: Any yet your grades are average around low-A to high-B?**

**Kitsune: I'm just lazy, ok?**

**Kratos: So you admit to it! Ha!**

**Kitsune: Fine! I admit it! I am a lazy bastard! So what!**

**Kratos: I like pie!**

**Kitsune & Towa: …**

**Towa: Just start the damn story already.**

= Konoha Academe =

Iruka had started to call out the names of the teams, starting with Team 1 and moving up. "Alright, Team Seven will be Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uch-"

"YES!" shouted Sakura.

". As I was saying, the last member will be Naruto Uzumaki."

Everyone looked at Sakura who had dark storm clouds over her head. Though some of the people around her would swear they heard a "Shit." Escape from her lips.

"Ok…" continued Iruka, "Your Sensei will be Kakashi Hatake. Team Eight will be Hinata Hyuga, Kiba Inuzuka, and Shino Aburame. Your Sensei will be Kurenai Yuuhi." He took a breath. "Team Nine is still in circulation from last year, so Team Ten will be Ino Yamanaka, Shikamaru Nara, and Choji Amakichi." This time everyone heard a shout of "SHIT!" that came from Ino.

"DAMNIT! STOP INTERRUPTING ME!" Shouted Iruka, leaving several students in shock, having never heard their teacher swear.

"Okay then. Your Sensei is Asuma Sarutobi. Now you are dismissed for a lunch break, then we will wait for your teachers to arrive." Everyone bolted out of the class room, except for Naruto and Sasuke, they never bolted, and Sakura, who was still moping.

After lunch, everyone was in the classroom, and after a few minuets of waiting the window was shattered open, and a black ball of cloth flew into the middle of the room, followed by a streak of tan and purple. The cloth was unraveled and pinned to the ceiling and walls to reveal it was a sign. The streak stopped in the middle of the room and shouted what was written on the sign. "Sexy and Single: Anko Mitarashi!" Kiba took that opportunity to wolf whistle.

The class was shocked at the new arrival, and the crickets could be heard clearly. Iruka was the first to compose himself. "Um… Anko? Why are you here?" Hearing her name Anko turned around and latched onto Iruka's arm, sticking it into her ample bosom. "Iruka-kun! I'm here to pick up my new students!" This got the class into an uproar, gossiping about who was the lucky, or unlucky, ones stuck with her. After a few seconds, Iruka used his 'Demon Head Jutsu' to shut them up. Everything was quiet after that, until the door opened, and the unimportant Jonins came in and retrieved their unimportant students. A couple minuets later, A woman with long black hair and scarlet red eyes walked in, introduced her self as Yuuhi Kurenai, scolded Anko, and took Team Eight with her. As soon as he left, A man with black hair, brown eyes, and smoking a cigarette, walked in. Naruto remembered him as Sarutobi Asuma, the Sandime's son. He took Team Ten, leaving Anko, Iruka, Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura as the only occupant's in the room.

One hour passed… Two hours… Three hours… Then the door finally opens, and a man with silver hair that tilted waaay to the left, a headband covering his forehead and left eye, and a mask covering the rest of his face, except for his right eye and some skin around it. He looked at the desks, and lazily waved at the three irate students, giving a small "Yo!" in greeting. He then looked toward Anko, who was sitting on Iruka's lap glomping the poor/lucky man.

"Anko? What are you doing here?" The masked man asked. Anko stops her glomp and looks at him.

"Kakashi! You are soooo fucking late!" she shouts while pointing an accusing finger at him.

Kakashi looks sheepish (Somehow .) and rubs the back of his head, his eye becoming a little smile in the place of his mouth. "Sorry," he apologizes "I guess I got lost on the road of life." This causes everyone to faceplant. "Meet me on the roof in five minuets.

When everyone is on the roof and sitting, Kakashi begins his little speech. "Alright everyone, how about we introduce ourselves."

Sakura looks at him funny "Sensei, what do you mean by that?"

Kakashi shrugs, "You know, your likes, dislikes, hobbies, dream, stuff like that."

"Can you go first Sensei, to show us how it's done?"

"Ok then. My name is Kakashi Hatake, I have lots of things I like, a few dislikes, my dream is…. Well, I have lots of hobbies!" the three students are deadpanned. The three think in unison 'all we learned was his name!' Kakashi snaps them out of their slump by announcing Anko's turn. "You already know my name, I like Dango and Nai-chan. I don't like white snakes and people who are LATE!" She turned and shouted this into Kakashi's ear. "My hobbies include Tea Ceremonies and playing in Training Area 44. (You'd be surprised how people get the number wrong) My dream is to have a white snake skin on my wall, after I've gutted it while it is still living." She ends with a sickly sweet tone of voice.

Kakashi points to the left, "Now it's pinky's turn" this makes her fume.

"My name is HARUNO SAKURA!" she really stressed that part. "I like or well… the person I like is…. my hobbies are, um…. and my dreams are to marry…. *Squeal*." She was constantly looking at Sasuke.

"What do you dislike?"

"Nar-er…" she stops from a danger sense.

"Narer?" Kakashi jokes.

"Narutos in my ramen, yeah, those little fishcakes." Sakura recovers as Naruto nods approvingly.

"Anything else?"

"People who get in the way of my love!"

"Hm… Ok then, Now it's cloaky's turn."

A grave and scratchy voice responds, "My name is unimportant, but my dream is to burn this city to the ground." Kakashi's single eye widened at that, but the sudden laughter halted him from getting his kunai. "Nice! He actually fell for it!" laughed out Sasuke. A more used, but still monotone voice responded. "Yeah, it was pretty good. But for real now. My name is Uzumaki Naruto. I like my family, and dislike those who would harm anyone in my family. My hobbies include training, gardening, and spending time with Mother. My dream is to make Mother happy."

"…Fine then. Now for Mr. Giggles." That nickname make Sasuke stop from his fit of laughter, and replace it with a glare and a scowl.

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I like my Mothers, how Itachi used to be, and my new brother. My hobbies include spending time with my new family, and learning my old family's techniques. My dream is to kill the man my brother has become, and avenge my old family, so a new Uchiha can emerge from the ashes of the old." Sasuke announced.

Responses varied, Naruto was still bland, as he always is. Sakura had Hearts for eyes, and was drooling over how 'cool and romantic' Sasuke was. Kakashi kept a mask of indifference, and Anko just stared… ok the responses weren't that different, girls stared, males were indifferent.

Kakashi looks over his students. "Ok, now I shall tell you about the Real Genin Test." This got the children's attention, and Sakura's voice.

"But Kakashi sensei, I thought that we were already Genin!" Kakashi chuckles a bit. "What's so funny?"

Kakashi looks at them with a mirthful glint "That was just to weed out the weaklings. This is to see if you can really handle being on a Genin Team. And out of the nine teams that passed the Academe's exam six will be returned to try again next year. That leaves a failure rate of 33%!" Explained Kakashi. "Now, meet me at training area 7 at six o'clock. And don't eat breakfast."

"Why?" asked Sakura.

"Because you'll just throw it up. Jan e." and with that he disappeared in a poof of smoke, followed by Anko.

**Kitsune: There! Another Chapter Done!**

**Towa: So, when is the next one coming out?**

**Kitsune: Whenever I feel like it.**

**Kratos: Can I write it?**

**Towa: No, we discussed this.**

**Kitsune: Really-?**

**Kratos: Aw, why not.**

**Towa: You're too stupid, I told you that. TWICE!**

**Kratos: Well, in that case…*Starts Dancing and Singing* I'm too stupid for the story, too stupid for the story, and I am feeling really horny!**

**Kitsune: WTF? What the hell is wrong with you?**

**Kratos: *Still Dancing and Singing.***

**Towa: Let me handle this, *Pulls out Staff and hits Kratos on the head***

**Kratos: Oh, stars… *Faints***

**Announcer: K.O.! Perfect!**

**Kitsune & Towa:…**

**Kitsune: Didn't we lock him into the basement?**

**Towa: Yes, so how can we… Shit! He's using the vents!**

**Kitsune: I knew that was how he could talk to us, but how can he see what happened?**


	10. Tests Suck

_**Mothers Chapter 10: Tests Suck**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or any elements of any **_

_**Anime/Manga/Movie/Book/Video Game that I may or may not include in this, or any **_

_**of my stories. Thank you for your cooperation**_

**Kitsune: Sorry I'm late, but my computer caught a bunch of viruses and died, taking all my incomplete chapters with it.**

**Kratos: Liar!... Wait, that's true...**

**Towa: Ugh...Quiet...**

**Kitsune: Anyway... On with the chapter!**

* * *

=Training Ground # 7=

'Mother, Sasuke. Sakura is the only one here.' Naruto thought.

**'I am aware of that Naruto-kun. I knew they wouldn't be here.'** Kyuubi replied.

Sasuke looked quizically toward her/Naruto. 'Then why didn't you tell us?' Kyuubi sighed in response.

**'Because as a ninja, you won't be able to get enought sleep all the time, and sometimes your clients will set you up. Consider this a little practice session' She replied smoothly.**

The boys nodded their heads in response. They walked over to three training posts set up a little off to the side of the field, where sakura was sitting half asleep, and sat down to meditate. After three hours had passed, all parties were more than a little pissed. Two figures finally came trudging through the undergrowth. Kakashi and a slightly blood splattered Anko.

Sakura was somehow instantly awake and on her feet. "YOUR BOTH LATE!" Howled the fangirl. Kakashi was the first to recover.

"Sorry about that, but a black cat crossed my path, and I had to take the long way around to prevent bad luck" He 'expained' Sakura was about to retort, but Sasuke was talking before she shouted, instantly mesmerising her with his annoyed tone.

"Kakashi-Sensei, I thought that you had to grab the cat by the tail, drown it in boiling salt water, bury it at the area where it crossed you path, THEN take the long way around. Am I wrong?"

Kakashi, showing his ninja skills of improvision, replied steadly without missing a beat. " Yes, but that's only if you want to guarantee results. Unfortunatly, Anko caught me before I could cook it, so I settled for just taking the long way."

Sakura then looked over to Anko, her visual perception slowly returning to reality. "A why are you la... WHY ARE YOU COVERED IN BLOOD!" She Screeched in terror. Anko looked down at her self, and seeing that she was indeed covered in the precious life substance, adopted an 'oops, my bad' look, complete with her hand scratching behind her head, and her tounge sticking out slightly.

"Well... I was going to take a shower and redress after an interrogation session, when I ran into Kakashi and had to drag him here. We would have been here an hour ago, If he didnt insist on taking the long way around." It was Naruto's turn to contribute to the conversation.

"Wait. If you would have been here an hour ago, and you had been doing you job, what the hell were you doing for the other two hours Kakashi?" All three genin glared venomously at the silver haired scarecrow. His eye turned into a little 'u' or a smile, depending how you look at it.

"I was busy playing Shogi with Maito Gai" The rest of the team face plant. "Now that that's out of the way," He continued " It's time for your test." Kakashi pulled out two little silver bells from his pocket and jingled them. "You have two hours to retrive these bells from me, anyone without a bell will fail, and be sent to the Academe."

"But Kakashi-sensei, there are only two bells."

"Exactly, wich means one of you will undoubtly fail. Two more things, Anko will be hunting you during this test, and If you don't come at me with the intent to kill, you won't pass this test."

Naruto reached his hand out, cloak already flying toward his target. "Fire pri-" he stopped talking when he felt cold steel to his neck. 'Is this the speed of an elite jonin? Increadible.'

"Tsk tsk tsk, I didn't say start yet Naruto. I think I'm starting to like you guys a little." He puts a clock on the middle post. "Now then, begin!" All other occupants dissapear. Kakashi takes a lazy look around. 'they've hidden themselves well, Sakura needs some improvement, or some hair dye' thought the silver haired ninja, spying sakuras bubblegum locks in a patch of bushes. He then finds Sasuke and Naruto's Chakra signatures in some trees behind him. 'Sasuke needs to learn chakra supression, but not as bad as Naruto. Kids basically a flare to any ninja with sensory training.' Naruto jumps out of the tree and lands a couple yards behind Kakashi.

"You and me let's go." He challenges. His target gives him a 'Are you kidding me?' look.

"Ya know, your a little weird."

"The only thing weird here is your face!" Retorted the Blonde. Sasuke faceplanted out of the tree, Anko fell behind him, her sneak attack ruined.

"Lesson one, Fuinjutsu." Kakashi preformed a few handsigns then slamed his fingers, alit with a purple flame, into Naruto's stomach. It only took him a fraction of a second. "Five Pronged Seal!"

Naruto's cloak dissapared as he buckled over onto the ground. 'It hurts so bad, what did he do to me? Mother?' her reply was barely a whisper to him.

**'An ele... seal! Pre... me... helping...'**

Naruto stands up on shakey legs. He casts a glare of absolute hatred to his opponet.

"That should keep your 'mother' from interfearing, Now for the real lesson one, Taijutsu." he reaches into his pocket, causing naruto to tense, until he sees the orange book that was retrived.

"The hell? Why are you reading during our battle." Naruto shouted, outraged.

"Why, to find out what happens in the end, of course. Go ahead and attack, I won't be bothered."

Naruto charged at Kakashi in a blind rage. Of course, since he never got to truly spar during the academe, and sense when he did fight mother helped, he got his bum whooped until he missed on a spin kick toward Kakashi's head.

Kakashi preformed some hand sighs, ending with the Tora Seal.

'Naruto, Get out of there!' Sasuke cried through the link, which was unfortunatly shut off due to the Seal on Naruto.

"Never let your enemy get behind you, Naruto. Konohagakure's Hidden Secret Taijutsu Technique: One Thousand Years of Death!" Kakashi then proceded to insert his fingers into Naruto's unprotected rectum. The pain from this 'attack' in addation to the Five Pronged seal, caused Naruto to lose consciousness as he flew into the forest next to his other teacher.. Looking over to where sasuke lay defeated, he then disappeared toward his last student. 'And then there was one.'

=Mean while=

* * *

"Anko, Why are you attacking me?" Shouted Sasuke as he avoided a flurry of Kunai.

"Simple, this is your test!" She replied casually, but her grin said she was enjoying this. The game of 'Dodge or get Stabbed' continued for a while, until Sasuke noticed Kakashi holding the Tora sign, right behind Naruto

'Naruto, Get out of there!' He cried, then faceplanted due to the 'attack' Kakashi used. Fortunatly, his falling helped him dodge some weapons thrown at his person, unfortunatly, it allowed Anko to rush over and knock him out that much more easily. Anko looked over to Kakashi as Naruto rolled to a stop at her feet. Seeing him go after the last member she dragged them over to the training posts.

* * *

=Later=

The three genin were aroused from their slumber by the ringing of an alarm clock. Kakashi and Anko were standing infront of them, looks of dissappointment on their faces.

"All of you, I've decided not to send you back to the academe." The three genin were happy, and sakura would have jumped for joy, if not for being tied down. "That's right, I'm going to remove you three from the ninja program." Naruto burst at that.

"What the hell do you mean? So what if we didn't get the bells! That doesn't mea-"Anko interupted him.

"The reason you failed isn't because you lost the bells, but because you all didn't discover the true meaning of the test!" They looked at her confused, until Kakashi elaborated.

"It's teamwork."

"But Naruto and I already work great as a team, and you two kept us appart the whole time!" complained Sasuke. Kakashi explained.

"True, you to do work together, but why do you think you are on teams of three? If you had tried to include Sakura, you would have passed."

"Then why am I tied to a log and not them!" she complained. Anko replied this time.

"That's becaue you couldn't break a simple Genjutsu." Sakura looked ashamed.

"Now, Anko has convinced me to give you one last chance, you have five minuets to eat from these bentos and recover your energy, but do not give Sakura any. These are my rules and they will be obeyed. We'll be back." He and Anko dissappered in a puff of smoke.

After a few seconds Sakura's stomache rumbled, causing her to looking down and blush. "Here" She looked up to see Sasuke holding up his bento to her. "But sensei sai-"

"Ignore him, you'll need your strength." Naruto said, holding up his bento beside sasukes.

Sakura was touched. "Thank you, but my hands are tied." Sasuke sighs deeply. He grabs some food and puts it infront of her mouth. She bites and swallows it.

In a flash the sky had darkened and a powerful wind had started to blow. Kakashi appeared infront of them glaring malevolently.

"WHAT DID I SAY! YOU BROKE THE RULES!" he bellowed.

Naruto glared back."We work together."

Sasuke joined him, "We protect our own."

Sakura halfheartly glares up, "We are a team."

"FINE THEN, IF YOU WORK AS A TEAM, THEN AS A TEAM YOU SHALL...pass." calmly finished kakashi, the cloud's and wind disappeared, and Anko appeared as the final word was said.

"Wha?"

"You see that rock behind you, It is a monument with the names of Konoha's greatest heros. They are all shinobi, like yourselves, but with one key difference." the genin leaned foward, listening intently.

"They all died in the line of duty". This shocked them still. "The names of my dearest friends are on this monument. One of them told me these words, which you three should take to heart. 'Those who break the rules are trash, this is true. But those who abandon their friends and comrades are much worse than that'." He continued solemly. Anko then spoke up. "Enough with this depressed atmosphere, you all report at the small bridge beside the Dango shop at seven sharp for missions! You all can celebrate now!" Kakashi released the seal on Naruto, and the jonin's left to tell the results.

**'Can you here me?'** Kyuubi asked, getting two replies of 'Mother! What happened?'

**'Well, It seems placing a restraining seal over the one holding me will completly block off our axcess to each other.'**

Sasuke looked to Naruto. 'that explains why you couldn't hear my warning'

'Huh?'

'During the test, when he impaled your rear.' Sasuke deadpaned.

'Oh.'

Sakura looked at the two worriedly. "Hello? Can one of you untie me?" she asked. They snapped out of their trance and cut the ropes, then Sasuke turned to her.

"Sakura, this is it. We are shinobi now, and need to take things seriously. That means no more worring about your hair and makeup, or going on some rediculous diets. If you train hard enough, you would burn away any fat you would gain from eating normly anyway, just look at Naruto." She turned and seeing he hadn't gotten his cloak back on yet, saw his lean muscular figure. She was about to ask about the multitude of white lines on his skin, when he spoke.

"Sasuke, we need to go home, and I need to see a doctor about my colon." They left, leaving a bewildered female behind.

* * *

**Kitsune: How was that? Good? I hope so.**


	11. Author's Note

Author's Note/Poll Notice/Plea for Help: Sorry I haven't Updated any of my stories in almost two years, but between random story ideas, and collage, I haven't been able to concentrate on writing my stories. If anyone can help me restore my creative juices, maybe with an Idea I might or might not use, please send me a PM. Also, I will give you credit for your Idea if I use it, or get the jucies flowing because of it.  
Also, I have written the first chapters for a couple of new stories that I could get down. I will have a poll to see what you think I should do with them.

Another thing, I have Deleted stories that my friends and family said had no chance. I normally wouldn't but I agree with them.


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